Tuesday, March 25, 2008
He who can do this has the whole world with him.
I often went fishing during the summer. Personally I am very fond of strawberries and cream, but i have found that for some strange reason, fish prefer worms. So when I went fishing, I didn't think about what i wanted. I thought about what they wanted. I didn't bait the hook with strawberries and cream. Rather, I dangled a worm in front of the fish and said: "Wouldn't you like to have that?"
Why not use the same common sense when fishing for people?
Why talk about what we want? That is childish. Absurd. Of course, you are interested in what you want. You are eternally interested in it. But no one else is. The rest of us are like you; we are interested in what we want.
So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get somebody to do something. If, for example, you don't want your children to smoke, don't preach at them, and don't talk about what you want; but show them that cigarettes may keep them from makng the basketball team or winning the hundred-yard dash.
Tomorrow you may want to persuade somebody to do something. Before you speak, pause and ask yourself: "How can I make this person want to do it?"
That question will stop us from rushing into a situation heedlessly, with a futile chatter about our desires.
Here is one of the best bits of advice ever given about the fine art of human relationships. "If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own."
That is so good, I want to repeat it: "If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own."
That is so simple, so obvious, that anyone ought to see the truth of it at a glance; yet 90% of the people on this earth ignore it 90% of the time.
Remember: "First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way."
--> Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People
Why not use the same common sense when fishing for people?
Why talk about what we want? That is childish. Absurd. Of course, you are interested in what you want. You are eternally interested in it. But no one else is. The rest of us are like you; we are interested in what we want.
So the only way on earth to influence other people is to talk about what they want and show them how to get it.
Remember that tomorrow when you are trying to get somebody to do something. If, for example, you don't want your children to smoke, don't preach at them, and don't talk about what you want; but show them that cigarettes may keep them from makng the basketball team or winning the hundred-yard dash.
Tomorrow you may want to persuade somebody to do something. Before you speak, pause and ask yourself: "How can I make this person want to do it?"
That question will stop us from rushing into a situation heedlessly, with a futile chatter about our desires.
Here is one of the best bits of advice ever given about the fine art of human relationships. "If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own."
That is so good, I want to repeat it: "If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person's point of view and see things from that person's angle as well as from your own."
That is so simple, so obvious, that anyone ought to see the truth of it at a glance; yet 90% of the people on this earth ignore it 90% of the time.
Remember: "First, arouse in the other person an eager want. He who can do this has the whole world with him. He who cannot walks a lonely way."
--> Dale Carnegie, How to Win Friends and Influence People
i know that i have loved you ... at 1:55 AM
fate crumbled all around 0 identities
fate crumbled all around 0 identities